To say I have bad luck would be an understatement. The unfortunate, the unlucky, and typically the unheard of happens to yours truly. Just when I decided to thank the universe for giving me a college campus in which I THRIVE at, a virus swept across our globe, and a pandemic pushed pause on my oh-so-perfect college experience. Or so we thought… until school resumed the next day. Virtually.

If anyone else is a student trying to survive this experience with online education, you will understand what I mean when I say it is exhausting! Somehow, school immediately became all day, every single day. No evenings, no weekends, no down time! It suddenly felt impossible to separate school, work, politics and personal life. I mean, how do you keep everything separate when you never get to leave? Even though it feels impossible at first, one of the most important things you can do in order to succeed in school during this pandemic is to keep everything separate. Trying to do an assignment while making dinner and answering work emails simply does not set you up for success! I quickly learned that just like normal life, I needed to create a routine for myself that felt as close to normal as possible. I created a digital planner, and used different colors to symbolize the separate obligations I would need to commit time to during my day, and the week as a whole. I created daily checklists, and made sure to note what day/time assignments were due on my weekly planner to avoid turning in late work. Designate time and space to each activity, and take everything step by step, day by day. Even though it can feel really difficult to separate from school during COVID-19, I believe it is equally important to focus on you.

I have chosen to occupy my time with endless DIY projects in between work, school and sleep. I have painted coolers, made macrame plant hangers, decorated (and re-decorated) my entire living space, and learned new skills! I learned how to make clothing with my cricut, how to use armor etch for glass products, and my greatest flex yet, I learned how to use power tools!!! Power tools are stereotyped to be “just for men,” but I refuse to allow myself or anyone around me to accept that a man can do a project that a woman cannot. I hand built my first set of corn-hole boards, painted them, and gave them to my boyfriend for the holidays! Thanks to this project, I received my first set of tools for Christmas. They’re pink too! Every single gift I wrapped, shipped, or handed off during this holiday season has been hand made. I even ended up putting on my “brave girl pants” and making my own Etsy shop! COVID may have taken away my ability to learn in a face to face educational setting, and it may have taken away my ability to socialize as normal, but I refuse to allow my creativity and love for learning to be lost within this pandemic.

I believe it is extremely important to continue to empathize and understand that every single person on this planet is also experiencing a pandemic. At first, I felt so victimized. My college experience was taken from me in the blink of an eye. My presidency on campus was taken from me faster than I ever could have imagined. I was separated from my second home and my second family, without even saying goodbye. I went through a major depressive state, where I felt it was genuinely impossible to exist on days where I was not forced to rise and go to work. More and more conflict was rising in my home, and I felt less and less comfortable in the space I was going to be required to remain in for the remainder of the year. I was isolated to a place full of sadness, conflict, and a lack of understanding of what it meant to be alive when the world around us felt dead. One day I realized that when I lost my college experience, my sister lost her senior year. My cousin lost her last year of middle school. My other cousin lost her elementary school education. Can you imagine not being able to attend in-person first grade?! Everyone lost so much during this time, and that is the one and only thing we can all understand and empathize with. Eventually, I decided it was time to turn the situation into a positive one. I connected with a therapist online, and began my journey with mental health (virtually). I have grown so much as an individual thanks to my ability to reach out for help when I needed it most. Now, I recommend this experience to anyone and everyone going through the same COVID depression that I went through. I believe in normalizing the discussion of what it feels like to be alive during these times, and what we miss about our “normal” lives. I believe in being able to analyze, reflect, and try to understand why we may be acting the way we are during these times. Often, I feel that people try to control others when they are unable to control the situation that was thrown upon us. I see this in situations with my living situation and my roommates constantly, and I take a moment to step back and say to myself “Lex, she feels anxious and out of control because of the pandemic, so she is trying to gain control wherever she can.” Empathizing with someone who feels anxious and out of control is a lot easier when you can understand what it feels like to be anxious and alive during a global pandemic.

Not only were we thrown into a state of shelter in place and online education, but we also were forced to sit back and experience a historical presidential election right in the middle. For a while, this is what an average day looked like for me: Wake up. Get ready for work. Go to work. Sanitize. Help a customer. Sanitize. Ask customer to put a mask on. Hold back tears as they argue about wearing a mask. Sanitize. Politely ignore adult men asking to discuss Trump’s re-election while trying to hand them drinks through the drive thru window without touching them. Sanitize. Adjust mask, then sanitize again. Deep breaths as your anxiety begins to tell you that the customer who refused to wear a mask gave you COVID. Sanitize. Do this for 7 more hours. Sanitize. Drive home, consider getting another COVID test the entire drive home. Shower and sanitize. Sit down, turn on the presidential debate. Turn on virtual class. Multitask. Ignore roommates’ uneducated comment about presidential election. Hold back tears. Consider doing something fun, but decide the day was too mentally exhausting. Sleep. Feeling like the only educated, anxious, and empathetic individual can be difficult during these times. Being an employee during a pandemic is hard, being a student during a pandemic is hard, and being young during a pandemic is hard. The combination of all three can feel like too much sometimes. Again, prioritize yourself and utilize resources to improve mind, body, health and happiness. Read books, go on walks, write in a journal and listen to new music. Don’t give up on life, even when life feels ugly and contagious.